Fake it till you make it!

We live in a world of quick fixes and remedies to rectify almost every single failing or flaw we can dream up, so I was left stunned by my reaction to a particular 'garment' I stumbled across when lingerie shopping a while back. Following the initial shock, I then struggled to contain the giggles within the more refined section of a department store.

If you're still wondering what I could possibly be referring to, I was shocked by the image of a rack of flesh-coloured, padded 'butt enhancers'. When I first spied them across the room, I thought they were rather exaggerated padded versions of the bandeau tops I had been hopelessly searching for. Although, I was astounded by what I thought was rather artificial looking cleavage - little did I realise I was staring at an enhanced butt crack and not cleavage.

Still in the dark, I thought it was odd these bandeau 'bras' had been unfairly positioned among an array of knickers (no wonder my hunt for these tops had been so elusive - I was looking in the wrong area all this time!) As I stood gripping and rhythmically squeezing the 'bandeau' as if it were an irresistibly tactile stress ball, I came to realise I was holding a pair of butt enhancing knickers with silicon butt cheeks!

So my question is do women actually buy these and wear them? Being 'blessed' with a shelf-like derriere of my own, it's one 'wonder' item I don't need! There weren't that many 'rumps' available for sale, and I bet any man would feel understandably duped when it came time to remove the said knickers and the juicy, plump booty fell to the floor instead of remaining on the hips.

I can picture ashen faces of men all around the world, akin to when women nervously removed their 90s wonder bras to reveal their true busts. Bitter men around the world will scream 'false advertising'! What's next?